'Cause its a tragedy it'll only bring you down,
Now I don't know what to be without you around.
Holy crap that's a really good song. Its called Breathe by Taylor Swift. Not really the best of days today, that urge that I never told you about came back. And to be honest, I wanted to do it, hell I even did. Now I just have to hide it from my mom, :(.
Okay, feeling like crap is a normalcy of mine, and sometimes its just like I wanna take a drug and overdose. Just so I can possibly kill myself. And no I'm not suicidal. Although sometimes I wish I was. My mom came home a total bitch today. Nothing new there. She sounded so nice on the phone. IDK what happened.
Do you think if I just one day "disappeared" people would even notice I was gone? Would the writing that I had completed be published? Would there be a funeral? Would my little sister even know I existed? How much would I be missed? (That's an easy one to answer, not much by friends, a lot by family.) But you know if I were a ghost I would want to see my funeral, because I would want to know who would show up and who would cry. Would any of my friends come? Or would I just fade away into a world of oblivion?
I've been seriously questioning the sincerity of some of my friends. To be honest I think all of them are pretenders and that they all just keep me around because I can keep my mouth shut, (most of the time at least).
And just for the record I hate it when someone tells me to go inside just because they're mad at me. Just thought you should know.
XOXO
Addo
Now I don't know what to be without you around.
Holy crap that's a really good song. Its called Breathe by Taylor Swift. Not really the best of days today, that urge that I never told you about came back. And to be honest, I wanted to do it, hell I even did. Now I just have to hide it from my mom, :(.
Okay, feeling like crap is a normalcy of mine, and sometimes its just like I wanna take a drug and overdose. Just so I can possibly kill myself. And no I'm not suicidal. Although sometimes I wish I was. My mom came home a total bitch today. Nothing new there. She sounded so nice on the phone. IDK what happened.
Do you think if I just one day "disappeared" people would even notice I was gone? Would the writing that I had completed be published? Would there be a funeral? Would my little sister even know I existed? How much would I be missed? (That's an easy one to answer, not much by friends, a lot by family.) But you know if I were a ghost I would want to see my funeral, because I would want to know who would show up and who would cry. Would any of my friends come? Or would I just fade away into a world of oblivion?
I've been seriously questioning the sincerity of some of my friends. To be honest I think all of them are pretenders and that they all just keep me around because I can keep my mouth shut, (most of the time at least).
And just for the record I hate it when someone tells me to go inside just because they're mad at me. Just thought you should know.
XOXO
Addo
